The Last Night
by theonlyeligoldsworthy
Summary: What if Julia didn't die in a car accident? Song fic to the song "The Last Night" by Skillet.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything Degrassi nor it's characters. Nor do I own the song "The Last Night" by Skillet. If you haven't heard the song before reading this: No worries.

* * *

_"The last night you'll spend alone. _  
_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go_  
_I'm everything you need me to be." _

I woke up to a message from Julia saying she needed me and was on her way over. The immediate thought was that her parents were arguing and took it out on her causing her to hurt herself. I've been trying to convince her that it's not her fault that it's theirs. With a small sigh, I walked out of my bedroom wearing nothing but my boxers and headed downstairs to let my girlfriend in. As soon as I got downstairs I opened the door to see her crying and immediately took her in my arms and hugged her causing her to hiss in pain and for me to pull away.

"I'm fine." she whispered.

"That's bullshit." I whispered back as I checked her bandaged wrists telling me what had gone on.

"You knew you could've called." I assured as I took her back in my arms and shut the door.

"I know, but I didn't want to interrupt you." she said softly and looked up at me as her arms were wrapped around me. I dipped down and kissed her chastely.

"You wouldn't have interrupted anything." I whispered and kissed her again, this time a little more passionately for a moment and pulled away to lead her upstairs.

"I told them." she muttered half way up the stairs as she squeezed my hand a little, I looked down at her curiously. As if on cue she looked back. "They told me it's a phase that everyone goes through. I told them it's depression and they told me to stop being so morbid and gloomy, that everything with me is ok and I'm fine." she said as a few tears ran down her cheeks.

"Jules, you're not fine. This isn't ok, you shouldn't hurt yourself for any reason." I stated softly and moved to stand in front of her as I took both her hands in mine. "Move in." I whispered

"I can't. You already know my parents don't approve of us or of me. We're 15, Eli." she stated.

"And we were 14 when we first had sex. CeCe and Bullfrog love you, Jules. Stay with us, move in with us, we love you more than your parents do." I pleaded knowing that cutting can get really bad if not treated right and she's been dealing with it for a year and to me it seemed that it was getting worse each week. The cuts on her arms and wrists were getting deeper and it worries me.

"I'm sorry, but I can't." she said with her head hung down and a few tears falling down causing me to wipe them away.

"It's ok." I whispered as I picked her head up to look at me and gently pressed my lips against hers.

"I'll give you tonight." she offered and I smirked at her.

"Thank you." I whispered and kissed her lips again, then lead her to my room.

I was expecting to talk to her once we got to my room, but the minute I closed my door she pulled me towards her and kissed me deeply. I moved my hands to her waist as I kissed back frantically and passionately emitting all the love for her into the kiss that I could muster. "I love you." I whispered against her lips as I stripped her of her jacket.

"I love you too, Eli." she whispered back as we kissed and she pulled me with her to the bed. I laid her down and climbed atop her and took her pants off her as she helped me by removing her shirt and bra. "I need you, Eli." she whispered as she stripped me of my boxers. I nodded and removed her panties before kissing her body and memorizing every inch like I'd do each time we made love. "No foreplay." she whispered the minute I went to put my head between her legs, I nodded and move to kiss her lips as I rubbed myself against her folds.

"What position?" I asked curiously knowing we've tried a lot of different positions after a while to experiment and see what ones we liked most.

"This one. I want to see your face as I lay under you." she whispered meaning missionary. I nodded and slowly slipped myself inside of her. My thrusts started off slowly as I looked into her gorgeous eyes and wiped the hair from her face.

"You're gorgeous." I breathed trying not to let out a moan or whimper. Soon her gorgeous, musical sounds started to fill the room as she whimpered. My pace started to get a little harder, but still remained slow as I looked into her gorgeous dilated brown eyes as I started to let out small whimpers. Everything about her was amazing and beautiful and she herself was a turn on in my eyes. I dipped down to kiss her passionately as she whimpered against my lips and started to dig her nails into my back causing me to let out a growl. "Shit." I breathed softly as I pulled away from the kiss.

"Faster. Please?" she asked and I obliged as I sped up my pace a little faster and increased the force of my thrusts. "Eli." she whimpered softly with her eyes closed meaning she was starting to get close so I dipped down to kiss her neck and then breasts to pleasure her more. My bangs were starting to stick to my face as her nails started to dig into my back more causing me to go harder into her. Minutes later I could feel her walls tighten around me as she came, I followed and reached my orgasm seconds later. That's when it hit me that I neglected to put on a condom and nearly collapsed on her.

"I forgot to put on a condom." I whispered.

"It's ok. Don't worry." she smiled as she pushed my sweaty bangs out of my face and kissed me lovingly. I reciprocated as I slowly pulled out of her. "That was amazing." she whispered and I smirked at her.

"It was." I agreed and wiped her sweaty hair out of her face, then brushed it behind her ears.

"Hold me?" she asked as she yawned a little.

"Of course." I smirked down at her and looked at the time as I moved off her. I noticed that it was midnight and by now she's normally sleeping. I moved to spoon with her and wrapped my hand around her waist as she covered us up and laced her hand with mine. My other hand lay under her head as we started to go to sleep. "I love you." I whispered before falling asleep. Two hours later I woke up and instinctively moved Julia closer to me as I held her tightly to envelope her in love as I always did when she stayed over. I kissed her head one last time and let myself fall asleep.

By the time I woke up the next morning Julia was gone. I hurriedly put on my boxers as I ran downstairs to look for her, instead I saw my parents.

"Did you see Jules?" I asked breathlessly.

"No, we didn't know she spent the night." CeCe admitted causing me to run back upstairs. It was then that I saw a note from her on my dresser.

_Dearest Eli, _

_Thank you for last night. It was truly an amazing and remarkable night, but I can't bare to burden you anymore. I know you're probably saying that I'm not a burden to you, but I am. I can't help thinking that maybe my parents are right and I'm at fault for everything. The only time I feel truly loved is in your arms and it pains me that I'll never be in your arms again, but rather a memory. You were everything I needed you to be and more, so much more. _

_You opened my eyes to everything. You showed me love, life, what it's like to be loved and care deeply for someone. I didn't know it was possible to feel that until you. That's why it's so hard for me to say goodbye to you. I couldn't wake up with you and if I did I knew I wouldn't leave. That I wouldn't let you go, you were and still are my everything. Don't worry about me because by now I'm happy and free, the only thing missing is you. By now I'm at home laying in my tub, if I did it right and the pills worked I'll be smiling down at you. You've given me more than I could ever ask for and for that I'm utterly and eternally grateful. Don't cry for me because it's too late. _

_Looking at you sleeping as I'm writing this is bringing tears to my eyes. It's so hard to say goodbye to you even if you are unconscious I can't help, but to resist the urge I have to remove all my clothing and climb back in bed with you, but I can't. Like you tell me when something doesn't go right or the way it planned: it's not in the cards. I'm not happy with my life when you're not around and I can't keep bringing you down when I have a bad day or run to you to cheer me up or make things better. We're still teenagers, Eli and nothing is written in stone, the future can't guarantee me that you'd still be there and I'm afraid that if I stayed things would only get worse. I don't want that to happen, I didn't want to drag you down the dark road that I was headed for. This was the only way I knew how to save you, to save us. Maybe now my parents won't think it's just a phase. _

_Please smile. I went by your house last night to give you the one thing that I knew I could give you: my last night. My last night there on Earth. It was magical. Everything about last night was magical and I couldn't ask for more. You were my world and I want you to move on with someone else when you're ready. Don't hold yourself back, for you're meant for great and better things than I was. I wasn't meant for much and I get that. You're meant for so much more, you have a whole ton of love to give, don't close yourself up or ever stop loving someone because of me. Don't let me hold you back from showering another with love. You're going to be great. You're going to do great, live life and keep moving forward. _

_I'll always be by your side and in your heart when you need me most. Don't ever stop living and always stay happy and move forward. _

_Love always, _

_Julia. _

My thoughts instantly ran wild as I sunk to my bed and allowed my tears to fall freely as they steadily ran down my face and crashed on the blanket. I looked over the note a few times and moments later heard CeCe and Bullfrog rushing to my room.

"She's gone." I whispered as they both moved to sit next to me and held me between them. Each of them had their arms wrapped around me as I sobbed the loss of my first love, my first girlfriend. It makes sense now that she told me not to worry after we made love last night.

"Do you want to be alone baby boy?" CeCe asked and I nodded.

"Please." I said as tears continued to fall. They both nodded and left my room. I guess they had gotten a call from Julia's parents or something letting them know she passed. Rather than being mad and screaming at the top of my lungs, I silently crawled back in my bed, covered myself up, lay in the position that Jules and I fell asleep in, moved her note onto the pillow, then held her pillow close to allow her scent to fill my nostrils as I closed my eyes and fell asleep hoping this is all a bad, twisted dream. But I know it isn't, I know my Julia isn't coming back and that she's gone, but I'll never forget that she gave me her last night and how she spent it. She was loved.


End file.
